Internet "research" into jokes various European nations find funny
what the Germans like:
"Why is television called a medium? Because it is neither rare nor well-done."
"You're a high-priced lawyer! If I give you $500, will you answer two questions for me?"
"Absolutely! What's the second question?"
"Well, you see, there are basically three kinds of people in the world. Those who can count and those that can't."
"A guy phones the local hospital and yells, `you've gotta send help! My wife's in labour!" The nurse says, `calm down. Is this her first child?' He replies, `no! This is her husband!"'
Canadians are not funny, apparently, nor are they European, but they like this:
"What do you call a woman who can balance four pints of beer on her head? Beatrix."
"A guy walked into a psychiatrist's office wearing only cling-film underpants. The psychiatrist said: `well, I can clearly see you're nuts."'
Whereas women prefer:
"A man walks into a bar with a piece of Tarmac under his arm. He says to the barman: `A pint for me, and one for the road'."
And the best the Brits came up with:
Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars.
During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: "Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce."
Watson says: "I see millions of stars, and even if a few of those have planets, it's quite likely there are some planets like Earth, and if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life."
Holmes replies: "Watson, you idiot. Somebody stole our tent ..."