actually there's eleven...
1. To give it a Times Square feel, everyone is groped, fondled and pick-pocketed
2. The 'Party Hats' look suspiciously like stolen traffic cones
3. There's a "Happy 2006" sticker on the packet of shrimp you've been eating all night
4. It's being held in March
5. Prison regulations require lights out at 10:00 pm
6. The guests have decided to start the midnight countdown at 10,000
7. At midnight everyone gathers around to watch your Uncle Earl's pants drop
8. You hear a guy doing a count down before using the bathroom
9. The 'Champagne' tastes suspiciously like apple juice mixed with Alka Seltzer
10. The Amish can do many things well, but throwing parties ain't one of them
11. It's just you and a dozen Mullahs in a cave
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